The unpredictable baby shower
by ibexie
Summary: The twilight gang goes to a surprise baby shower - surprise is that no one knows who it is for…until they get there... All human! please R&R written by Twilightlover15 and myself.


The unpredictable baby shower

Summary: the gang goes to a surprise baby shower- surprise is that no one knows who it is for…until they get there...

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Chapter one

Edward's P.O.V

"Edward let's go! We are going to be late." Alice called. I really did not want to go to out tonight, let alone to a baby shower. I don't even know who it's for.

"Edward, come on!" Alice shrieked once again. Ugh! I figured that to save myself from the never ending torture of the one I call Alice that I might as well go downstairs. I knew there was no way of getting out of this.

"Alice, I can't believe you're forcing me to go to this baby shower. I mean we don't even know whose it is."

"Edward, please. You will know who it is for as soon as we get there. Think about it this way, maybe you will meet someone there."

She nudged me with her elbow. I rolled my eyes at her; I couldn't believe that she was actually making me go to a baby shower-I thought that they were only meant for girls? I couldn't be put through that kind of torture. _Maybe you will meet someone there and actually have a good time, _a voice said in my head.

_Yeh a pregnant woman_ I replied to the voice in my head…great now I'm talking to myself _Yeh you're going crazy_ Shut up! I demanded the voice.

"Alice, you already know who it is…just tell me already." I groaned; I knew that Alice had an insight to knowing things that would happen-we joked all the time about her being psychic but we both knew that was just silly and superstitious.

"Bye mum, bye dad-don't wait up" Alice yelled whilst practically dragging me out of the door and into my Volvo throwing my keys at me from the passenger side door.

"Drive." I didn't need telling twice, there is one thing I've learned over 17 years of living with Alice-don't attempt to argue. I raced out of the drive and down the freeway to the city hall where this thing was being held.

Bella's P.O.V

"That looks perfect Bella! Let's go!" Jessica practically squealed with excitement; of course she'd say that-she'd been trying to get me out of the house for the past hour.

"Okay, okay this will do I guess." I over checked the outfit in the mirror; not that it ever mattered much. I just wanted to match how the others might be dressed so as to not stand out too much from the crowed.

Jessica practically dragged me down the stairs and out the door I only just managed to quickly snatch my bag and keys off of the kitchen table and yell my quick goodbyes to Charlie.

"Ergh; we're not taking that old thing are we?" Jessica huffed, sticking her big nose up in response to the 'distasteful' choice of my truck.

I frowned "And what's wrong with _that thing_?" I asked mocking her tone on the use of calling my baby a _thing_. I obviously felt indignant that she had insulted it-it might have been old but it hadn't ever failed me before.

"Isn't it obvious?" She said snidely, as if I needed anymore information that just the remark she'd already made.

"Obviously it isn't…" I muttered darkly under my breath, I clearly wasn't going to make anything out of this. "What do you propose we take then?" I asked mockingly it was obvious that her parents couldn't afford to buy her a car; she had no right to mock mine.

"Fine. That. Let's. Go." She growled under her breath I just chuckled in response to her unwillingness to get into the dang car.

As soon as she was buckled up I pushed the car as fast as it would go, well under 50mph, down to the freeway to where this baby shower was going to be held.

"Who's this for anyway?" I asked confused…all Jess had told me was that it was a baby shower and she wanted me to come she and Mike (another boy from my year) were planning it.

"It's a surprise" was the only response I ever got.

"So for them and us?" I asked cheekily.

"sure…"

This should be interesting…

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Edward's P.O.V

The drive didn't take too long with my driving speed. I actually managed to get there 10 minutes ahead of the time that I'd planned. I took a look over at Alice; as usual unaffected by the speed of my driving. Damn.

I followed Alice slowly into the town hall, glancing back longingly at my baby. Maybe this baby shower could be turned into something to do with my car…I let the thoughts race through my head as I tried to block the fear of what I had for pregnant women and babies (I guessed that it must have had something to do with my childhood). Of course; I'd never admit to having such fears-not to anyone.

"Oh, people are here." A gentle angelic voice noted.

"They're too early…tell them to go and wait out in their car." A wretched nasal voice responded. I didn't care how ugly or miserably familiar that voice sounded. Right now I loved them for proposing that, hopefully we'd 'loose track of time' and either be extremely late or miss the whole thing altogether. Oh the schemes rushing around in my head.

"That wouldn't work." Alice responded in a board tone.

"Why?!"

"You know why!" She glared at me.

"Oh…because you're Alice…and nothing gets passed you." I glared at her, making her flinch slightly with the force. A smile tugged on my lips, I loved intimidating her.

Just at the time that the brilliant girl was about to respond the creature with the terrible voice came out into the hallway.

"Bella-Could you help Mike in the kitchen with the setting up please?" She tried to make it sound sickly sweet but it sounded like a chain smoker with all the rasping and rattling; it was truly the most vulgar thing that I'd experienced in a while. Not to mention that I've watched a lot of reality t.v shows recently-and horror movies. None of which could describe the repulsion of what was standing in front of me now.

"Mhm, I was just about to tell these two people to go out to the-" she started but got cut off when the she-devil herself glanced our way and squealed.

"Eeeeeddwooooooord." I cringed; she still couldn't manage to say my name correctly and at the least stop elongating the damn word. "I've missed you! Why did you leave Forks high?" She pouted I was sure that she was trying to make herself look sweet but it actually looked like a horse's rear end.

"Jessica" I said politely, I really couldn't help but be polite to people my mum had caused that response with her generosity to everyone. "So is this your baby shower?" I smirked, okay so my mum might have been generous but my dad wasn't as generous…plus we all have a wicked sense of humour. However it wouldn't have surprised me had she been pregnant; she was well known for that type of thing in the whole of Forks and possibly all the way out to Seattle.

She giggled in response thinking that my dig was a joke. She slapped my forearm "No silly, it's a surprise and we're not telling anyone whose it is until everyone is here."

"So, it's someone's baby shower who's already invited?" I questioned confused.

"Didn't I just say that?!" She snapped slightly agitated at my obvious thick headedness.

"So they'd know whose it is being the only pregnant person invited?" I asked still confused.

"Mhm; I guess that THEY would know." She was clearly disappointed that we weren't discussing her but I really wasn't in the mood to learn anymore about _Jessica Stanley_ at this moment in time; or any moment in time actually.

"So Eddie." I'm sure that she was trying to sound endearing, but it sounded more like a train tugging elephants along the track. She started running her fingers along my arm and I felt sick to the stomach. I started edging away from her casually trying not to look like I was frigid (I hate that word) or anything. I really didn't like the thought of someone like her touching me.

"Jessica, you need any help?" Alice rushed excitedly. Good for her I got here early. I rolled my eyes it was just like Alice to want to help organise something like this.

"Eh" She was confused by the sudden interruption, and looked around to see Alice standing behind me. She blushed a light shade of pink; probably due to being so repulsive in front of my sister. "Oh, Mike and Bella should be out in the kitchen you can offer them a hand, but I think that they're all finished up now. We should be starting soon."

"Oh goodie!" Alice squealed; "please could you show me there?" She asked sweetly, Alice could manage sweet.

Jessica sighed and reluctantly turned away from me. Storming off to the room that she had came from with Alice skipping along behind her. Before Alice fully entered the room she turned to me and mouthed me something that looked like a 'you owe me-big time!' I truly did.

Finally everyone was here and we could get this baby shower going. I was really anxious to know whose baby shower it was, I was hoping that it was either Jessica-or Lauren Mallory. Only because they were the most likely to be pregnant, and I was hoping against hopes that it was for the one that they called 'Bella'.

Jessica jumped up from the seat at the front and grabbed a microphone…great now her voice is going to be magnified, were they trying to kill our ear drums?

"Thank you all for coming" I took a look around at the amount of people that were sitting along the chairs in the main hall. Surprised at the turn out and the faces that I recognised, there actually were a lot of people. I saw Rosalie and Jasper-twins from the year above Alice and myself. When we were all at Forks High together we were all pretty good friends actually. I missed those two more than anyone else. Michael Newton, I growled I really hated that kid; I always thought that he and Jessica would be perfect for each other. Lauren Mallory, Tyler whatever his last name was, and some other kids from school that I didn't care much for. I also noticed that there were a few of the kids from La Push, three of them. For some unfathomable reason they always smelt of dogs…I guess it was due to having one? And next to the beautiful girl whose name I learned was Bella was sitting with a big burley guy; great I guess that must be her boyfriend…I knew she was too perfect to be single.

I sat around waiting for Jessica to finish her tedious speech on how she's excited that everyone could be here blah, blah, blah…

"…And the moment that you've all been waiting for!" Well I guess that this was her best attempt at grabbing our attentions, I wasn't complaining at least it told me that it was time for finding out who this baby shower is for-congratulate them-leave.

"Come on already!" Yelled the big guy sitting next to Bella, my sentiments exactly, a group of girls nearby giggled…guess someone has a crush on Bella's boyfriend huh.

"I'm getting there I'm getting there!" Jessica sulked. "Okay so like this baby shower is…yours!" She said pointing her disgusting fingers in the direction of-whom it was I couldn't see through the heads but as soon as they moved I noted that it was Bella. I gasped with shock and she looked my way.

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**This is written by myself bexy2008 and twilightlover15 please review and let us know what you think!! :o) Please. Even if it's just to say we suck. We want to hear your thoughts! x**


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